(Original posts) About this blog:

FYI - the first post is at the top of the list (Intro 1: Do You Want More?), and then you work your way down to "Pieces 10 and 11:  Looking Back and Going Forward."

And ...

Scripture quotations taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION.®  Copyright ©  1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society.  Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House.

Intro #1: Do You Want More?

[I am updating these posts to make them shorter and better, and with more Bible verses.  Click here for the updated introduction.]

Through the Refining Fire:  Your “Sweetly Broken” Journey

A heart-and-faith-changing workbook for those who like to read about someone else’s journey, think deeply about their own, ask the hard questions, challenge themselves, and journal.

Intro 1:  Do You Want More?

            In John 10:10, Jesus says, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” 

            Okay, now, let me ask this:  How many of us really feel that we are living our lives to the fullest?  Abundant lives?  Vibrant lives?  Eternally-effective lives?  I’m going to suspect that most of us are just hoping to make it through the day, maybe accomplishing one extra chore on our To Do list.  Just so we can fall exhausted into bed, and then wake up tomorrow and do it all over again.     

            We are overloaded, stretched-thin, and ready to break . . . or we’re just plain bored.  We feel alone, unimportant, and overlooked.  We go through the motions each day without any sense of deep joy or satisfaction or accomplishment.  Does anything we do really matter?  We desperately want life to be “more”. . . or we just really want a vacation.   

            And the Christian life isn’t very exciting to us, either.  It’s not the joyful journey that we expected it to be.  It feels like work.  We have to smile pleasantly, sing and pray well, serve our time, and look like we have it all together so that we can measure up to others and impress God.  Or . . . we’re just plain bored.  Church is all just monotonous messages, sleepy music, and an hour of trying not to fall asleep.  But at least we had a chance to get our grocery list planned . . . if we managed to stay awake.  And we got our brownie point for the day just by being there.  Right?  

            Where is this abundant, vibrant life that we were promised?  What does that even look like?  Where is the love and joy and peace?  Life is just so hard and discouraging, feeling like it’s all up to us.  Always trying, yet never feeling good enough.  And we wonder why we are so tired and why life is joyless. 

            But it doesn’t have to be this way.  There is a different way, a better way.  The way of brokenness. 

Intro #2: Starting the Journey

[I am updating these posts to make them shorter and better, and with more Bible verses.  Click here for the updated introduction.]

            Psalm 14:2:  “The Lord looks down from heaven on the sons of men to see if there are any who understand, any who seek God.”   

            Maybe you’re thinking, Okay, so I am ready to start this challenge.  I want to become diligent in my relationship with the Lord.  I want to draw ever nearer to Him and to live a life that is glorifying to Him.  I want to be humbled at His feet.  I want Him to prune away anything that may be hindering my relationship with Him, so that I can have a deeper, more genuine, more vibrant relationship with Him.  How can I do this?  How can I become Sweetly Broken?       

Piece One: The Desire to be Broken

[I am updating these posts to make them shorter and better.  Click here for the updated version of Piece 1.]

            Psalm 51:17:  “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” 

            Okay, if you are still reading this then I would guess that you have a genuine desire to be broken, or at least you’re curious about it.  And the first step to brokenness is seeing your need for it and desiring it. 

            During this step, all you need to do is pray. 

            It does not need to follow any formula or specific words, just tell God of your desire to be humbled.  (There’s a sample prayer at the end of this post.)  He doesn’t need fancy words or long prayers, but He does need us to open our hearts to him.  He needs our invitation.  He needs us to express our willingness to be molded. 

Piece Two: Honesty and Transparency

[I am updating these posts to make them shorter and better.  Click here for the updated version of piece 2.]

  

Honesty with yourself and transparency with the Lord! 

            Proverbs 12:22:  “The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.”

            Matthew 5:8:  “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.”  

            Pure.  Being free from impurities.  Impurities are those things that pollute what is true and genuine and good.  And what pollutes a true, genuine, good relationship with the Lord (and pollutes even our own lives) are falsehood and lies.  Hiding from truth and hiding the truth.  Deliberately living a lie or unconsciously agreeing with one.  These keep us from being able to really experience, see, and know God.  But if we will live authentic, transparent lives before God, we will know Him (and ourselves) in a way we never could before. 

            This isn’t so much of a step to go through, but something that we need to commit to for this whole journey.  Well, our whole lives, really.  Honesty is half the battle, because living a life of lies prevents any growth and keeps our hearts closed to God.  And I’m not even necessarily talking here about deliberate lies.  We know when we are deliberately lying to others, ourselves, and God.  And we won’t fess up to those until we want to. 

            But what I am mostly concerned with here are the lies that we don’t even realize we are living or agreeing with.  They could be lies we believe about ourselves or God, or truths that we refuse to see.  And we don’t usually know that they are there.  We just have a vague (or strong, vivid) sense that something is “off” in our lives or our relationship with God.  (Or we are simply refusing to see that things are “off,” which is probably the case a lot more than we know.)

Piece Three: Learning to Listen and Be Still

[I am updating these posts to make them shorter and better.  Click here for the updated version of Piece 3.]

            Psalm 46:10:  “Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”

            That is one of my favorite verses.  I’m working on a goal right now to find my top five “life verses” and that is one of them.  And it’s funny because when I was in high school, I went to a Christian retreat and that was the key verse for the week.  And all I could think was, How boring!  What a boring verse to pick to inspire, challenge, and “activate” the teens for Christ.  Be still?  Blah!

            But now, this verse has become so dear to me.  So, I guess I’ve come full circle.

            To me, this verse is all about humility.  A humble person is one who has learned to trust in God’s goodness, love, and faithfulness so much that, despite the storms that rage around, they can “be still” because God is God!  A humble person desperately desires to be near the Lord and to bask in His presence, and so they have learned the importance of being physically and mentally still with the Lord at times.  And a humble person also knows that everything is about God’s glory!  He will be exalted!!!

            Oh, I love this verse!!!

            But it took me a long time to learn to be still because, deep down, I couldn’t trust others, not even God.  I couldn’t “be still” before Him because I was too busy and concerned with keeping all the balls up in the air.  And as a consequence, I never knew the incredible joy and delight and peace of resting in His arms.  Of being still.

Piece Four: Radical Obedience

[I am updating these posts to make them shorter and better.  Click here for the updated version of Piece 4.]

  

            I would have to say that of all the pieces, I think that this one is the most important.  (If any one of them can be considered more important than the others.)  And I’m not saying this like God necessarily needs our obedience or else He’ll be at a helpless loss.  But because obedience says the most about our relationship with God.  Obedience tells us if we are able to hear His messages and if we know His Word, if we trust Him enough and are willing enough to do what He says, and if we love Him and have really made Him God of our lives.  Let’s take a moment to explore some of what the Bible says about obedience:

Piece Five: The Word of God

[For the shorter, better, updated version of this post, click here: "Updated Piece 5: The Word of God."]

            Before I went through the furnace, I loved God’s Word.  And I valued it immensely.  And at different times in my life, I would immerse myself in it.  But at others, I would realize that I didn’t take it out for weeks.  I knew it was important . . . I just didn’t live like it was important enough to be read every day.  (I’m just being honest here.)  I was so busy with life that I convinced myself that it was enough to listen to godly music and read godly books.  Scripture was extra.  Beneficial, but not as inspiring as music and inspirational books.  And frankly, it was so familiar that it was boring and just not doing much for me anymore. 

            And as far as prayer was concerned, when I used to have my insomniac-ish nights, I would lay there and quiet my mind and pray, asking God to speak to me . . . in the hopes that by silencing my mind, I would actually be able to fall asleep.  I didn’t really want to hear from Him.  I just wanted sleep. 

            But now, after the furnace, the Word has become so alive to me.  And prayer has become a life-line - an intimate, mind-boggling connection to my Heavenly Father.  In fact, now I find that I have a hard time falling asleep because I don’t want to miss anything that He might want to tell me in the quietness and stillness of my heart and mind.  It’s amazing to me that I, a lowly little worm, could communicate with the God who created the heavens and the earth, and that He actually wants to hear from me all the time.  It’s very humbling. 

            I have found a hunger and a thirst for the Word and prayer that I never knew was possible.  The Bible is not just God’s words to me anymore, but God’s heart being poured out to me.  I am overcome with a deep, insatiable hunger to meet God in His Word and in prayer.  This is the God of the universe, who is available to us and who wants to meet with us daily. 

            And we’d rather be watching television or reading a magazine or sleeping.  Mind-blowing!   

Piece Six: The Importance of Prayer

[For the shorter, better, updated version, click here: Updated Piece 6: The Importance of Prayer.]

            If we do not see the immense value of prayer, it could be because of misconceptions we have about what it is.  (Or it could be because we are preoccupied with self and being self-sufficient.)   

            So, I want to take a moment to review some misconceptions that many of us have about prayer.  (Many of these I looked at in the “Understanding God’s Will” series at https://myimpressionisticlife.blogspot.com and https://sweetlybrokengirl.blogspot.com.  Find it under the “labels.”)  

            I believe that, in general, we see prayer very differently from the way God sees it. 

            We want it to be a “magic button” that we can push to get what we want; whereas, God wants us to pray so that we can remain close to Him and accomplish what He wants.

            We want prayer to be there when we need it; God wants us to pray because we need Him. 

            We want to be comfortable and not have to spend too much time in prayer or get up too early; God wants prayer-warriors. 

            We want the easy road; God wants people who can boldly storm the gates of hell.

            We want to build the greatest entertainment center in the world; God wants us to build His kingdom. 

Piece Seven: A Correct View of You

[I updated the posts in this series.  Click here for the Updated Version of Piece 7.]

 

            In Child of Mine (at https://sweetlybrokengirl.blogspot.com), I wrote all about my insecurities and fears and about how they affected my relationships with people and with God.  But the thing is, I know that my story isn’t any different from so many other people’s stories.  Many, many of us come from broken, hurting pasts.  And so we all carry around scars and defense mechanisms, and we have walls that we put up for self-protection.  Walls that keep people and God an arm’s length away. 

            But I never knew the incredible freedom that came with letting God break through them … until I fully opened the door of my heart to Him!  And now I want so much to help others do this, too. 

            The thing with people who have been hurt in the past is that we spend our lives trying to protect ourselves from being hurt ever again, even by God.  (Except we don’t always know it.)  We don’t let people get too close.  We’ve learned not to expect too much from others, not to cling too tightly or to desire too much from them.  We’ve learned not to need others or to let ourselves be loved by others.  It would just hurt us anyway.  And so we sabotage relationships with other people in many different ways. 

            Ways such as these: 

            1.  Sometimes, we sabotage ourselves from the beginning by reaching out to the wrong people.  We pursue people who are unavailable.  That way we never have to risk a real relationship where we might get our hearts broken.  (This was my way.)  We settle for superficial relationships and small talk, so that we don’t invest too much into other people and they don’t have to invest too much in us (especially because we don’t feel worth their time or their attention).  We make it easy to leave.  We don’t want them to feel like they have to be bothered with us.  We don’t get too close or real with others because they might become disappointed with our real selves and then they would reject us.  It doesn’t hurt as bad to lose someone who we never let get too close. 

Piece Eight: A Correct View of God

[I updated the posts in this series, so click here for the Updated Version of Piece 8.]

            One reason I have so strongly stressed our need to be in the Word daily is because this is where we find God, as He is.  And if we are not relating to God as He is - as He has revealed Himself to be in His Word - we are relating to Him out of falsehoods, misconceptions, preconceived ideas, and half-truths.  And many times we are relating to Him in unhealthy ways because of our broken pasts and broken hearts. 

            We just don’t know it. 

            But if we continue to do this - if we do not put the effort and thought into correcting our unhealthy views and our unhealthy ways of relating to Him - our relationship with Him will always be stunted, shallow, or damaged. 

            As I went through my own furnace of trials, I realized that there are (at the minimum) two critical areas that we need to address when it comes to getting a proper, balanced, biblical view of God. 

            In order to have the most complete, whole, and satisfying relationship with Him, it is most important to correctly understand God’s holiness/justness and His love.  They are two sides of the same coin.  And we need a biblical, balanced view of these two things.  (When I say holiness, I also include His justness.  It is because He is so holy that He can demand justice.  And when He acts justly, He does so out of His holiness.)    

Piece Nine: A Time of Waiting

[I am updating these posts to make them shorter and better.  Click here for the Updated Piece 9: A Time of Waiting.]

            As I reflect back on my time in the furnace, I have to say that the most growth seemed to happen during the times of God’s deafening silence.  As we waited for years to get direction from God about finally buying a house, it seemed that the greater my need for an answer and for God’s leading, the quieter He got. 

            At first, I pleaded with Him for a sense of direction and for a house.  But by the end, I was just pleading to have any sense that He was even there, that He cared and was listening and hadn’t abandoned me.  What started out as a search for a home ended up as a search for knowing that I mattered to God. 

            It’s ironic to me that the greatest level of growth that I have ever had in my relationship with the Lord came out of a time when I doubted everything about my relationship with Him.  The most growth I have ever experienced in my understanding of prayer came from feeling like I totally failed at it. 

            And I could only get to this point by facing the walls and fears and doubts that I had inside.  And I could only do that when God hid from me.  Because the more He hid, the more I pursued.  It wasn’t that He had abandoned me (even if it felt that way); it’s that He knew I was ready to dig deeper and pursue Him more.  And this wouldn’t have happened if I was pampered by His presence and by His blessings.

            I think that there are at least five reasons why God remains silent for stretches of time: 

Pieces Ten and Eleven: Looking Back and Going Forward

Piece Ten:  Looking Back on the Journey

            There are no guaranteed results from this trip through the furnace.  It all has to do with your willingness to be honest, transparent, and obedient, and with how much you invested in self-introspection, prayer, Bible reading, and learning to listen to the Spirit. 

            And once again, there is no real end to this journey.  I would love to be able to say, “Congratulations on working your way through the Graduate School of Faith.  Here is your diploma.”  But that can’t happen.  Because we will never graduate until eternity comes for us. 

            But as you climb higher and dig deeper with the Lord - as you shift your focus from the temporary to God’s kingdom and His righteousness. - your life will become more vibrant, alive, and fulfilling.  It might still be painful, but it will be a bittersweet pain, knowing that God is with you through it all.

            And most likely, we will end up in the furnace again from time to time.  We will slip.  We will at times get tired of digging and climbing.  (Oh, don’t I know it!)  But we will be drawn back to God, because we know the blandness of life apart from Him and the exhaustion of trying to do it on our own.            

            Before we get into some ideas for future challenges, I would like to pose a few more questions for reflecting back on the whole journey that you have been on up to this point.  (Some of these will overlap, but that’s okay.)